Ten Step Guide to Being a Black Leader in Amerikkka for White Folk
Part 2 of 2

Published by: C-101 Editors
Obama Singing

This wonderful man is the epitome of being a wonderful black leader for white people! He seamlessly turned a crisis of 9 black people being shot into an opportunity to sing Amazing Grace, which was written by a slave master! By doing this, he was endorsing the notion that no matter what happens, black people should always forgive….

A continuation of the satirical piece inspired by Ayi Kwei Armah’s book KMT: In The House of Life.

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STEP 6: Keep Everything Parochial: Make sure you maintain division by continuing the myth that the primary struggle is for “black” people in America. Continue to engender the schizophrenia many of them suffer by emphasizing “solidarity” with Africans in other parts of the world, not that they have one unified struggle. After all, our paymasters have had the infinite wisdom to impose themselves on the rest of the world as the ultimate in human advancement, so as their property, we are the ultimate in black advancement. This is really important….always emphasize that there is NO FUTURE for black people outside of America.

Being a black leader for white people is hard work. It may take a toll on your looks, but you will still get the perks and advantages of managing black people's anger, just like this guy!

Being a black leader for white people is hard work. It may take a toll on your looks, but you will still get the perks and advantages of managing black people’s anger, just look at Al Sharpton! That suit….he’s clearly a success! Who needs looks!

STEP 7: Keep the Black Masses Trapped in the Present: This is best accomplished by deemphasizing structures and focusing on current issues. A people who have no past sure as hell don’t know how to explain their present condition, thus shutting them off from a future they design for their best interests. This way you kill two birds with one stone because they start to believe their current condition is their fault. From there, you can use the idea of “personal responsibility” to control their efforts to shape their own future by keeping their actions confined to remedies prescribed by our white paymasters. Focusing on issues makes them all insecure because everything appears to be sporadic, without context, and overwhelming. This makes the masses ripe for explanations based in mysticism and hysteria whereby you can show your leadership skills by giving a sermon on how we fell out of grace with God and can only find redemption through obsequiousness and obedience! What type of person does this create….an atomized individual whereby the schizophrenic personality is wide spread and normalized, hence the common saying “niggas is crazy.”

STEP 8: BEWARE! NEVER SAY ANYTHING LIKE “OUR OPPRESSORS….”: WTF…are you trying to get paid, or be a trouble maker? We can’t stress this enough….you have to make sure black people think all their problems are organic and internally created. If you call our benevolent paymasters “oppressors”, then that automatically implicates black people as being oppressed. We have to use language that distorts and obfuscates reality, such as “underprivileged”, “disenfranchised”, and “at-risk.” The power of this type of language gives validity to the idea that black people always have the potential to “go native” and that their backward constitution can always be curbed when introduced to the universalism of Western society.

STEP 9: Be like Cool & The Gang….”Celebrate good times”: So now that you’ve made it over the biggest hurdles, it’s time to celebrate! This is a good tool to escape reality and delude the black masses into believing they have “reached the promise land” (i.e. becoming one with white folks). You can ignore pesky troublemakers like that misguided African writer Ayi Kwei Armah when he said “….there’s an ancient admonition that says that only suicidal idiots celebrate while their neighbor is agonizing.” 1

He’s absolutely correct in his assessment, but we’re not worried about telling the truth and giving clarity, we want to maintain our source of power by lulling people to sleep with extravagant celebrations valorizing our accomplishments as black leaders for white people! Could you imagine what would happen to us if the majority of black people took an interest in Revolutionary Pan-Africanism like they do with the NBA finals! We’d be done!!

STEP 10: Be Willing to Do Whatever it Takes: This is more of an observation and word of caution. If you can’t follow steps 1-9 and you have a little problem called a “conscience”, then you’re probably not a good fit to be a black leader for white people. You’re probably some latent Revolutionary Pan-African crazy that deserves everything coming to you and us respectable negroes have no use for your kind! You will never win a Nobel Peace Prize which is reserved for services rendered by white appointed black visionaries such as Barack Obama, Nelson Mandela, and Desmond Tutu. Are we Shakespeare’s Calibans or are we Ariels!?2

  1. Ayi Kwei Armah, Remembering the Dismembered Continent (Popenguine, Senegal:  Per Ankh, 2010), 133
  2. Shakespeare’s The Tempest is a parable on colonialism. Ariel was the loyal thrall to his masters, while Caliban was the “native” who refused to be anyone’s thrall. For more on this see Chinweizu’s essay “Calibans vs. Ariels” in his book Decolonising the African Mind (London: SUNDOOR, 1987).